Thinking parenting Blog
How not to shout at your kids
As parents, we all know that shouting at our kids isn’t a great idea. None of us embarked on parenting with ‘Shouty Mum/Dad’ as our ideal destination. But somewhere along the way,...
8 Books for talking to children about emotions
It takes time for children to learn to recognise and manage their feelings. Talking to children about emotions can help this process. Talking is usually best done when everyone is calm and no-one...
Parenting as a team (despite different parenting styles)
There is something about caring for children alongside someone else that really highlights your differences. Whether it’s friends, your mother-in-law or your partner, you never really know...
5 tips for maintaining a good relationship with your teenager
I have had absolutely no time to write this week, so here’s a quick video blog instead on how to maintain a good relationship with your...
Why don’t children just do what they’re asked?
A few thoughts on why children don’t always co-operate when you ask them to do something! If you are struggling with your child’s behaviour, check out our online parenting course and...
Talking to children about drugs
I know you don’t want to think about talking to children about drugs. We wish we didn’t have to. But at some point or other, your child is going to come across illegal recreational drugs....
Parenting on autopilot
Parenting is not something that anyone gets completely right. Like everything else, we learn how to do it by getting it wrong. (Just, hopefully, not too wrong). And there are some common traps that...
Encouraging co-operation: how to get children to do what they’re asked!
He just doesn’t listen! She just won’t do as she’s asked! Getting children to co-operate can be utterly infuriating. But when it comes to encouraging co-operation, there are some...
Building a family team spirit
There are lots of business theories about the science of team building. My favourite (mainly due to its simplicity) is the GRPI model. According to this model, in order for a team to be effective, it...
Talking to children about tragic events
As events remind us all too often, we live in a world in which bad things happen. And in this digital era of rolling news, graphic details about terrorist attacks, accidents and other tragic events...
The importance of listening to children
The problem with parents is that they think they know best. To be fair, we often do. But when we are convinced of our own inevitable rightness, it’s tempting not to spend enough time...
Positive Parenting in the Digital Age
Concerns about managing children’s screen time and the impacts of technology on children’s wellbeing are high on the worry list for modern parents. But most advice on positive parenting...
Why play is good for parents (as well as children)
When you watch children playing, it is impossible not to be struck by how completely engaged and absorbed they are by what they are doing. Play is the epitome of mindfulness – being 100% in the...
Weird and wonderful facts about teenagers
As the parent of teenagers, I have found that knowing a little bit about their internal mechanisms really helps me keep some of their less desirable behaviour in perspective. So, for your amusement...
Top tips for successful family meetings
Family meetings are a fantastic positive parenting tool for involving children in decision-making and talking through issues. They work especially well with older children and teenagers but can...
Building a good relationship with your child
How you think about parenting makes a difference. Too often we can fall into the trap of seeing parenting as a type of ‘correction’ role – pointing out to our children what they...
Book review: The Psychology of Babies (Lynne Murray)
*This review contains affiliate links Give me a baby and I can’t help experimenting on her. Sticking out my tongue to see if she will copy, striking up a ‘making-faces’...
Ground rules: catch them being good!
In most parenting dilemmas, we have a choice about how to respond. Often, the decision boils down to a choice between being a policeman or a coach. Put crudely, the job of a policemen is to catch...
Using a behaviour contract with teenagers
Regular readers will know that I am a big fan of reward charts. They help children to focus on the behaviour that is expected from them and they remind parents to catch their children being good and...
Why do children lie?
Why do children lie? Let’s be honest, all children experiment with lying. It is normal and – although it can be quite shocking for parents – it is not necessarily the start of a...
Encouraging good behaviour: setting ground rules
Setting a few clear ground rules for children puts you in a really positive place as a parent because it lets children know exactly what behaviour is expected from them. It also helps make sure that...
Helping children through divorce and separation
How are we going to tell the children? What are we going to tell the children? When are we going to tell the children? Believe me, I wish I had a script I could give you that answered those...
Good Cop Bad Cop parenting
Now, I don’t want to stereotype (other versions of Good Cop Bad Cop parenting are available!) but in my experience the ‘good cop’ in this particular parenting pattern...
When parents disagree about parenting
When it comes to children, no two parents in the history of this planet have ever had exactly the same approach to parenting. This is hardly surprising since co-parents have (by law!) grown up in...
Sibling conflict: a survival guide for parents
Sibling conflict can really leech the fun out of family time. A day of constant mediation between bickering children sends the best of us running for the wine feeling like a battered referee...
Communicating with teenagers: top tips for parents
Good communication is essential for building and maintaining relationships – chatting, sharing experiences, resolving problems and agreeing ground-rules. Which can be a bit of a problem when it...